The ABC’s of Sexuality

Know more about sex

I think that sex is really a beautiful thing.  It’s an activity that allows for much exploration and self-expression that I believe is crucial to our personal development.

I have been looking into the definition of some key terms that people use to describe their sexuality.  I’ve also included some helpful terms that will help to understand sexual uniqueness. It is important to note that this information is not meant to define one’s sexuality as it is a fluid topic that can’t always fit neatly into the square packages which we’re used to placing genders and sex issues.  Like I said before, sexuality is a form of expression and this information is meant to help to elaborate ideas about different tastes and preferences.

In an effort to compile the most complete list of different variations of sexuality that are practiced, I have named every related term that I could think of from A-Z.  I welcome any constructive comments that people might have that I could add to this list.

A

Agender: A person that does not identify strictly into the male or female gender.  A strong sense of being both or neither sexes. Being of no sex or sex plural.

Androgynous: Refers to a mix of masculine and feminine features.  

Translation - In short, an androgynous person does not fit into one sole category of only male nor female.  The best example I can think of for this is David Bowie and Casey Legler.

Asexual: Sexless.  Having no interest or desire in sex.

Translation – This person practices abstinence without inner conflict.  There is no need to suppress their sexual urges as none are felt.  An example here could be a nun or priest that is not conflicted with their vow of celibacy.

Autosexual: Sexual stimulation generated by one’s own touch.

Translation – This can be anyone who masturbates, squeezes his or her own nipples or taps their own bottom.  In the sexual act the person is stimulated by his or her own touch, and not an external touch, such as from a partner.  A clear example of this is running your hands over your own body and enjoying your own touch while stimulating yourself.

B

Bisexual: Sexual attraction to both men and women.

Translation – Bisexual relationships can vary between same sex partners, opposite sex partners and much more.  A bisexual person does not need to engage in a sexual act with both sexes, to fit this description.  The term merely describes a sexual affinity for both sexes.  An example of this could be a member in a threesome. 

C

Cross-dresser: A person who adopts manner, sexual role or fashion wear designed for the opposite sex.

D

Drag Queen: (1) An identity for men.  This could refer to a man dressed in women’s clothing. 

Translation - Often a drag queen will but is not limited to dress up for entertainment purposes.  Think of one of the best known drag queens RuPaul.

(2) This could also refer to a homosexual transvestite. See the definition homosexual and transvestite.

Translation: Don’t judge a book by its cover.  You may not be able to guess a drag queen’s sex based on physical attributes, but then again why should you?  Ask a person to know which gender they identify with to know for sure.

E

F

G

Gay: Sexual attraction to one’s same sex. (Especially for men.)

Translation – This is a same sex romantic or sexual relationship that in a couple takes the form of man-man or woman-woman.  Some celebrity gay couples are Anderson Cooper and Ben Maisani, or Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka.

H

Hermaphrodite:  A biological term referring to an organism with both female and male reproductive systems.

Translation - Move over Freud, this has got to be one self-fulfilled human being!  A hermaphrodite has both male and female genitals and sometimes coarse pubic hair and endowed breasts.  Sadly, some babies at birth have one reproductive system removed or supressed at birth based on their parent’s decision, but the psychological attachment to one’s sex can linger on for a lifetime.

Heterosexual: Sexually attracted to people of the opposite sex. 

Translation – As pair this takes the form of man-woman. An example of celebrity couples come to mind like Kanye West and Kim Kardashian, or Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson.

Homosexual: This is another word for gay (hyperlink to definition above) which describes a romantic or sexual attraction to one’s same sex or gender, however this term is inclusive of men and women.  “Homo” in this sense means same or identical.

Translation: In a coupled this can take the form of man-man or woman-woman, or another same gender variation.

I

Intersex: Refers to a person born with reproductive or sexual anatomy of both sexes and does not identify solely as male or female.  This term describes a sex or gender that is a mix of male and female.

J

K

L

Lesbian: Sexual and romantic attraction between females.

Translation – A lesbian attraction is only between females and takes form in a couple as woman-woman.  Think of celebrity couples like Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Ross, or Kristianna Loken and Michelle Rodriguez.

M

N

O

P

Pansexuality: Sexual and romantic attraction to all peoples regardless of the gender or sexual orientation.

Translation – A pansexual attraction is more inclusive than bisexual, for example.  A pansexual attraction is not limited to men and woman, but also includes androgynous, intersex, transgender and transsexual persons.

Q

Queer: Term that holds negative connotation towards homosexual persons. It is still in use, but the word is less popular because of its misuse as a derogatory and hateful term.

R

S

Shemale: This term describes the physical appearance of a person working in the sex trade born with a penis who augments their breasts’ size through surgery or by taking pills. 

Translation - This person works in the sex industry.  The physical characteristics are a mix of both male and female.  However, through feminine makeup and wardrobe, and sometimes mannerisms a Shemale might be physically perceived as a woman.

T

Tranny: This is often an offensive term used in reference to a transvestite, transgender or transsexual person.

Transgender:  A person taking on the physical characteristics of, wishing to be considered as, or having undergone surgery to become a member of the opposite sex.

Translation:  This person opposes the sex that they were assigned at birth and transforms themselves into the opposite sex.  An example of this could be the Jenna Talackova.

Transvestite: A person, usually male, who cross-dresses to gain a feeling of sexual or emotional gratification.

Translation: This is a person gets a positive feeling by wearing clothes that are designed for the opposite sex.  One example of this could be the character called Dr. Frank-N-Furter from the movie Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Transsexual: A person that does not identify with the gender which was assigned at birth, but strongly with that of the opposite sex.  Choosing to live as a member of the opposite gender often through reassignment surgery, but not always.

Translation: This person identifies and lives their life as the opposite sex.  In the eyes of the community at large, the person for all intents and purpose is regarded as a member of the gender which has been accepted as his or her own.

U

V

W

X

Y

Z